Friday, February 1, 2013

Ohio's Language of Love?

Katie Holmes was spotted with a man at the bowling alley:
Lady of New York Katie Holmes was spotted Wednesday night doing something more befitting her Ohio past: Bowling. Yes, bowling, that beery hobby of bad shoe-smell and filthy finger holes. Granted, Holmes was at Lucky Strike Lanes in Hell's Kitchen, which are kind of fancy, but still! Bowling! How pedestrian. And she was there with just one other person, a man. Bowling for two, eh? Some sort of witness says that the two appeared to be "just friends" — which, I mean, it is Hell's Kitchen — but I don't know if I believe it. Who goes bowling with just one other person on a Wednesday night as just a casual kind of a hang? Seems odd. Yeah, sure, they were just drinking "a few beers" and Holmes was in "floral overalls," which isn't necessarily formal date attire, but I dunno. What we do know is that she scored a 152, which is pretty decent! About halfway to perfect, which isn't bad. So, a good night had. But how good? Who was this mysterious male companion who she was bowling with until 1 a.m.?? Bowling is Ohio's language of love, so it could mean something serious. Or she could have just been hanging out with a male friend in Hell's Kitchen, where many of New York women's "male friends" reside.
That there is some fine Northeast Corridor writing if I've ever seen it.  Beery?  Filthy finger holes?  Ohio's language of love?  Ok, I have been on two fix-up dates involving bowling in the past few years.  Out of a grand total of like two fix-up dates.  But that's getting off the subject.  Oh wait, that was about all I had to say.  Well, that, and if Ms. Holmes just happens to be visiting western Ohio and needs a bowling partner, I'm one who will gladly let her beat me.  At bowling.  Get your minds and your filthy finger holes out of the gutter (intentional bowling pun).

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