What was the most surprising thing for you coming from your life before and actually living on a farm? Has it been de-romanticized for you?That was one of the tensions I ran into when I tried the dating thing in college. Everybody was planning on going on to a career in the fast track. The farm life didn't sound very appealing to most girls. Even in farm country there aren't a whole lot of girls who are looking for a life on the farm. Needless to say, I wasn't very successful (but the social awkwardness of isolation on the farm didn't help).
In New York, New Jersey, and Philadelphia, there are lots of accountants who have 10 sheep and call themselves farmers. There’s a big difference from that and people who farm for a living, when you’re relying on the weather to cooperate, and you get up at 4 a.m., or you get up to help animals in the middle of the night. There’s a real surrender of control in agriculture, so many things you can’t get your arms around. People say farmers are the salt of the earth, that they’re hardworking and honest, and it’s true. But I think that’s because farmers are more acquainted with the notion that this is all bigger than us. We know we can’t manage everything we think we can manage. Other people have more of an artificial sense of their ability to be masters of their domain, where farmers are, “Well, we gotta be patient. Plant something this spring and hopefully we’ll get something in the fall." That’s interesting to me.
In the advertising industry in New York, you’re always looking, keeping your resume polished and talking to recruiters. That always-looking mentality was deeply ingrained in me. In my 20s I changed jobs every two years. That quick turnaround is the antithesis of what farming is about, which is sticking around and cultivating things over a long period of time, delaying gratification. As someone who often solved problems by getting a new job, I’ve had to acclimate to this longer view of things. Getting comfortable where you are, that’s what farming’s all about. That’s why I think Ransom said to me on our first date, “I’m going to be here forever.” If you want to be with me, you’ll find a way to grow within this environment. I don’t think I realized what that was about at the time.
For a number of reasons, I did try to get away from home one time. The thing was, I wanted to go somewhere even smaller. When I tried it, I realized two things. First, if I wanted to actually farm, it would be much easier to do where our family was already established, no matter how quickly the area was developing around us. Secondly, I realized that I liked knowing about the place I was from: the people, the history, the land. Going some place else meant becoming a stranger. I decided the familiar was better than the unknown.
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